BROKEN PRAISES

I arrived the sunshine state, Miami, Florida and it was as beautiful as I had left it with a lot of similarities to my great country Nigeria, Lagos to be precise. The kids were excited, especially my little girl as it was her first visit. All the memories of my last visit came flooding in as I went through customs. I was determined to enjoy myself with my babies although the thought of my dear hubby came to mind on many occasions. I tried so hard not to think about it but it was a challenge. As we built up on our fun days in Miami with family, I eventually broke my silence to discuss my husband's untimely demise with my Aunt. As much as I tried to fight back the tears I just couldn't. It was really hard and although I knew he was no more, it was still kind of hard believing it and I so wished he was around on this trip with us but life must go on.

The kids enjoyed every bit of their holiday, especially spending time with their cousins. We enjoyed a lot of eating out, day trips, visiting friends and making new friends. My babies needed the break from everything happening around them and am glad they had a good time. As our holiday drew to an end, I felt excited and ready to take on the world again and so our journey back home began. On the flight back, I looked at my watch It was 11:45pm, UK TIME. I was now in the middle of watching THE STOLEN YEARS, an in-flight movie based around love, mistakes and second chances. As the movie drew much of my attention, some aspect of the movie brought back memories, especially the hospital scene when the lady was in a comma. I felt as though it was happening all over again and I recollected the last few days, hours, minutes I spent by my husband's bed side. It was extremely hurtful and I couldn't stop crying and as I cried even more I kept hiding my face away from the kids because I didn't want to break their spirits especially as we proceeded into the new year. Suddenly, over the intercom, I heard the pilot wish everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR and at this point, I immediately stopped the movie because it was getting too much for me. It seems everything and anything brought reminders and tears. Then I shook myself and said, "Layo, you really can't start a new year like this" so I wiped away my tears and said a prayer of thanksgiving to God for me and my kids and for the gift of life as I looked forward with joy to a great 2014. 

Back home now, and having a serious case of  jet lag,  I sat the kids down to take stock and to write down our target for the new year ahead. I put objectives to paper and at that point I  realised it was time to make my own NEW YEAR resolution. I thought hard and long about it and then decided it has to be THANKSGIVING. I could feel the excitement and joy in my heart as I thought over the past few years and realised how blessed I am. Really! you just can't stop been thankful and so I made a vow to always thank God every single day without complaining. I know it's a challenge but  His grace will keep me on check so I do not miss out on one day of being THANKFUL.

Often times we are tempted to complain about our current state why! Because we don't see the immediate change we want and in so doing we forget temporarily all the good God has blessed us with I am guilty of that also. Yes life is challenging but in my brokenness, and with a thankful heart I will forever praise God.  Even Jesus was thankful  Matthew 11:25 "At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children".

Don't leave the thanksgiving you have for God pending with the hope that someday you could get around it, but instead you must adapt the attitude of thanksgiving even when you are broken and feeling discouraged. If you are unable to find any reasons to thank him well take a good look around you. Or better still when God wakes you up first thing in the morning that should motivate you to get your praise on or when you look at your children and they are a constant source of joy again that's another reason be thankful.

I have formed the habit of looking back at my life line especially when I am discouraged it's my antidote and really God has been faithful and so I enter into the NEW YEAR with fresh determination and zeal to make an impact to my world....